Now here I am making it seem like this is gonna be some life changing post and you're gonna feel empowered by the end.Truth is,I'm feeling a little lost.I'm wondering when I started on this path of obvious evolution from the person I was.So I went to the obvious place you go to when times are rough, I went to church and perfect for me we were talking about friendship.And it got me on a whole search to see if the people I'm quick to say are my friends really care about me.Plus I realized Becka really is one of my best friends.Ah now here I am talking about her as if we should all know her.She's not your stereotypical white church girl;she's not walking around trying to prove that she's better than you yet there are some people that don't like her.HA,sucks for them.Anyway there we are talking about what's an authentic friendship and I realize that she's one of them.She listens to all of my dumb,trivial stories like they're the most riveting thing she'll hear all week.Long story short,I wish everyone could know and understand her like I do but you can't always have what you want.
Church wasn't the end of my search.I've realized that when I get into bed I sit for hours trying to decipher who I really am.I know I like to go out and party blah,blah,blah.But I know those aren't the sole focus of my life.In no way have I figured this whole thing out,hell this whole post is scattered like my whole being is right now.I guess this was supposed to help me vent and now the whole point has gone askew.Anyway have a love-filled MLK day.
Your resident loveaholic/lovehater,
Level
Church wasn't the end of my search.I've realized that when I get into bed I sit for hours trying to decipher who I really am.I know I like to go out and party blah,blah,blah.But I know those aren't the sole focus of my life.In no way have I figured this whole thing out,hell this whole post is scattered like my whole being is right now.I guess this was supposed to help me vent and now the whole point has gone askew.Anyway have a love-filled MLK day.
Your resident loveaholic/lovehater,
Level
I hvn't gone to church in 2 weeks ( which isn't normal for me. ) but even when I do go to church, I'm not there. Funny though because christmas eve I went to church for this christmasconcert, miscellanous ( spelled wrong - ithinkidontknow ) groups where performing. This one guy started singing that very popular song ' NEVER WOULD HAVE MADE IT ' . Its a really nice song, perfect lyrics but . . . it never had an impact on me before but christmaseve, omg . . . I broke down. Sorry I don't know if that was relevant to your blog ( goes back and reads it again )
ReplyDeleteEveryone is quick to do something. There are just sometime we do without thinking. And sometimes its a wart to really focus on whose there for you and whose not. I mean isn't it bad to do that anyhow ? Your judging them, something were taught not to do.
Omg finding out who you are can not happen in one day, evening , one church visit, lol. Its so tiring. I still don't know who I am and when I THINK I come close, you know I'm lost once again .
Its okay to be scattered, you should see my life, scattered but the same everyday.
I liked this, WRITE MORE !
i like this blog. im not much of a church go-er
ReplyDeletebut when i go 2 church it's always empowering.
I do the same things at night. this is a good blog very realatable.